Entrepreneurship & Expectations

I have been trying to wrap my head around this post for a while now. Every other night for the past two weeks I’ve sat down and tried to tackle it like any other post…outlining key points, considering conclusion paragraphs, and shaping potential titles, only to realize I am so overwhelmed that I usually just walk away. Frustrating to say the least.

The truth is a year and half into venturing into the world of entrepreneurship I find myself at a crossroads. I find myself tired quite often, and overwhelmed by the never ending to-do list. The excitement for the project at times feels more like a burden I am wearing…since it is literally impossible to shut off…impossible to qualify in the eyes of friends & family.

Being an entrepreneur has quickly made itself one of my defining characteristics—oftentimes not by my own accord. It works its way into your intros, into your bios, and before you know it your RSS is full of fellow entrepreneurial blogs, your lunch hour consists of Skype chats with other startup founders, and your weekends are spent wandering new sites, new tools, etc.  You consume stories of trial and error like it’s the bible, you find yourself seeking out other entrepreneurs if only to exchange a glance of exhaustion laced with extreme ambition.

I have grown to realize that entrepreneurship is a double-edged sword of awesomeness and it comes with expectations you’ve never considered before.

I am in no way saying that being an entrepreneur brings with it this impossible struggle unmatched by other professions. I’m not writing this with a chip on my shoulder, but instead I am trying to wrap my head around what makes entrepreneurship such a journey of personal growth. I think it’s worth noting that when you embark on an adventure tied to your name, defined by your actions, born from your thoughts…it is easy to lose sight of reasonable expectations.

All of a sudden success is no longer defined by the simple words it once was, for example: winning, profitability, influencing, or helping. Instead an entrepreneur lives with a hodgepodge of expectations that seem to snowball on each other. We must build something, expand, create, innovate, share, influence, teach, produce, return a profit…not to mention all the while sustaining a lifestyle bred on obsessive creativity.

There are so many pieces to succeed at, so many supporters hoping to see you win, so many skeptics to prove wrong, and so many personal goals you have set since that first day you bought the domain for your soon to be baby. Before you know it, you are unable to justify shutting off your computer or spending time on anything other than the project at hand.

Time flies too. You lose all sense of reasonable time lines, and instead phrases like “as soon as possible” and “now or never” become your stopwatch. Statements like “get it done” and “make it happen” become mantras that you can’t escape…not that you really even want to.

Entrepreneurship brings a level of expectation I have never experienced, and one I am still struggling to wrap my head around. I normally try to conclude my posts with some pretty little point wrapped up in some fancy smancy red bow (yes I just made up the word smancy),  but I’m not sure I really had one when I started this post.

Instead it seems enough to have admitted that although it is the best decision I have ever made, this journey of “being an entrepreneur” has certainly changed me. Whereas before I looked at launching your own venture as the defining characteristic to someone being an entrepreneur I have realized since, that it is a long road. The word has very little to do with the initial action and everything to do with how you handle the expectations that come with the lifestyle.

I have no idea where that leaves me now, but somehow just admitting how hard it is seems to help. Huh, who knew? Another lesson learned.